I'm a busy woman and frankly the very thought of Christmas preparation this year has left me feel a bit meh. It's odd. I'm normally the one holding up 200 Christmas trees looking for the "perfect" shape while my ever-patient husband waits to load it into the car (then hoovers out all the needles afterwards). I'm normally looking forward to a wreath making get-together with friends. I've normally already baked a Christmas cake (which no-one eats but me) and have an alarm to "feed" it lots of alcohol.
But this year, I dunno, I'm just not feeling it. To be fair my youngest is 16 now and couldn't be less interested in Christmas. She doesn't like parties, Christmas jumpers, Christmas food or, well, people really. She'll happily eat the same pizza she has the rest of the year on Christmas Day then disappear. She's home educated so there's no concerts, plays, nativities to attend until my grandson grows a little older.
My second youngest normally helps ignites some festive feeling but she's at university now and frankly no-one else in my family gives a flying Father Christmas about which napkins or crackers we should have.
I've got the entire family (7 children plus two partners plus my grandson) here for lunch on the 25th but since lockdown my energy for massive show off meals has waned to the point I can hardly be bothered to stir a turkey Pot Noodle. I'd rather enjoy the time with them than produce a perfect feast.
So this year I've decided to make Christmas easier and so far it's going well. Good job really as I'm in the middle of a huge Fibromyalgia flare which is killing any spark of seasonal jollity pretty much dead.
Here are my top tips for any of you who are also too tired/broke/busy to bake, decorate or spend hours in the kitchen
1. Fake it. I do have a real tree in my conservatory/dining area (picked up half price as a Tesco club card deal) and that does quite well because most of the time it's freezing cold in there! We only heat it when we have a family meal or friends over.
I'm not a fan of tinsel so I usually forage for greenery to decorate the rest of the house which looks lovely for a while and briefly smells nice but you inevitably end up with misplaced spiders wandering round looking for their hedge home, dried up leaves dropping and holly which always finds a way under your bare feet.
So how can I make our main living area look festive without tinsel or effort?
I did buy one of those little potted real trees for the living room but it was not loving the heat so I bunged it outdoors and have replaced it with an absolutely gorgeous faux four foot pre-lit Norway Spruce Potted Christmas Tree from We R Christmas (gifted) which has a span of 71cm, warm white energy efficient LEDs and a cute hessian base.
It took less than 10 minutes to set up and I like it without decorations but my daughter is home from uni later and she may choose to bedeck it. Literally everyone who has seen it, even one person sitting right next to it, has asked if it's real! Even our cat Tottie had to sniff it to check.
I particularly love the mix of PE and PVC tips giving the tree an authentic spruce look even up close.
The lights have 8 multi function settings from a gentle warm stationary glow to party-time extravanganza style. The tree has a low voltage transformer and a three metre lead and is suitable for both indoor and outdoor use. You can get 3-5 day, express 1-2 day delivery and even next day delivery so you could get one too in time for Christmas.
Best of all it will last for years. They come in different sizes (3ft, 4ft,5ft and 6ft) and it's so realistic I'm sorely tempted to buy a six foot one for the conservatory which will forever end the chore of getting rid of a real tree in January.
2. Cheat. My daughter makes a truly wonderful charcuterie board when she's in the mood but if arranging cheese and meat artistically only to be ruined by people who actually want to eat it makes you want to cry, head to pretty much any supermarket and peruse their festive food offerings which have vastly improved since the time spring rolls were considered sophisticated. I've seen a charcuterie tree, olive and cheese penguin kits, bacon wrapped halloumi and even Santa shaped butter.
3. Outsource. Back in the day I used to love all the Christmas "chores". I used to crank up the cheesy Christmas hits, warms mince pie or two and settle down to write cards and wrap presents.
Now, even though I've cut my gift list drastically, a mix of ennui and disability means it's no fun even with a ginormous bag of lebkuchen to motivate me. Now I outsource. Luckily I bred my own elves who will wrap for cash but if you didn't, ask friends and family if they have a teen with a few spare hours who would appreciate some extra cash. You might find someone raising money for World Challenge or who is too young for "proper" work. You can eat the lebkuchen while they wrap.
Hopefully a few short cuts like these will give you more energy to actually enjoy the main celebrations.