I spotted a headline today. "How wonky "British" teeth became Hollywood's new status symbol. This it appears is because Aimee Lou Wood is smashing it in The White Lotus even with what Vanity Fair is coyly calling her "natural" teeth which apparently "lend a welcome authenticity to her performance as Chelsea" in season 3.
The Telegraph states that veneers no longer rule the red carpet naming other actresses who have dared to keep their teeth Brit style which seems to indicate to Americans that in Blighty we don't value super whitened, super straight teeth. There's probably a private high level chat on Signal about this quirky aspect of UK/European life which I'm sure someone will leak soon.
So are my years of trying to disguise my less than perfect teeth with tight lipped smiles for the camera over?
It's not been fun, I'm not gonna lie. I have always been aware that people mock my gappy, wonky teeth. I was very hurt when I realised someone I worked with had made a note to remember me "rabbit teeth" which unfortunately showed up when I was trying to leave a nice comment on their blog.
The song "All I want for Christmas are my two front teeth" gives me PTSD. It wasn't funny when I was a kid and it isn't now.
So how do I have these teeth? Long story short. Young Afra. Young, reckless dad (possibly pissed). French bumper cars without seatbelts. Impact with handlebar in bumper car. Trip to hospital. Many visits to dentists with endless years of braces but bones in gum damaged so no straight smile for me.
As a teen I worried about snogging. Didn't seem to bother the boys 😜
As an adult I'm used to it. People are mostly far too polite to comment. And I worry more about my diabetic waistless body in photos to think much about my face. It's all collapsing now anyway.
My husband says he loves my smile but he would, wouldn't he?
I used to wonder what would happen when I needed false teeth. Would I finally have straight top teeth? Would it look weird? It almost wouldn't look like me? But it seems less people bother with false teeth nowadays and I can't afford those screw in things now, never mind when I am retired.
At least now I know I am in good company with a handful of celebs who like me have been through the bullying and can still smile.